Mom’s are always going to try to own the “child dressing skills” and claim that you are making all sorts of horrible errors when you dress your child, but this is just their way of coping with raging envy.
Here’s your big advantage in this area: you don’t care about it the same way mom cares about it. She’s passionate about dolling the kid up and prattling it around with shoes that match the hat & gloves, and knickers that match the season, but you don’t give a damn about what your kid looks like, and that’s what makes you an artist in the nursery.
That’s why moms will never be better at this than dads; they don’t have the god-given talent – the total eclipse of creativity – that comes built-in to dads.
She’ll never see that it’s a bit cold outside so we’ll just double layer the shark shirt on top of the onesie and wrap the scarf around his legs. Finish it off with some paper towels wrapped around his head and taped at the top (to keep the air from getting in… Damn you’re good!) and you’ve got yourself a kid; a kid dressed for success; a kid with a bright future.
Your wife and her friends might give you crap and laugh, saying things like, “Why the hell is he wrapped in towels!” and, “Where the hell did you find all that tin foil!?” Don’t let their words pierce you. Your dressing prowess is like the strength of a tiger, the balance of water, the gentle, constant ubiquity of gravity.
You are an artist; they are not.
“All true artists, whether they know it or not, create from a place of no-mind” (i.e., mindlessness, i.e., Dad’s win!)
– Eckhart Tolle
Image Credit: Gem66